April 2012
55 posts
Chelsea beat Barcelona on aggregate 3-2 at the Nou Camp
John Terry red-carded, penalty missed by Messi, Torres scores, 10-man Chelsea through to the Champions’ League Final…
Holy shit, and well done!
Game review on The Sun
H.P. Lovecraft Answers Your Relationship Questions
Dear Howie,
My girlfriend has metamorphosed into a kind of polyhedron with many pairs of feelers, membraneous wings, and fanged orifices on stalks. Should I talk to her about this, or keep hoping it’s just a phase? Snapshot enclosed.
Amateur Photographer
Dear Amateur Photographer: –
I do not know long it was before I dared to inspect your snapshot. Once I did, I immediately fell wholly to the floor. How much time passed after that, do not ask me to guess, but a momentary fragment of memory shows me racing dementedly past a long stone colonnade towards a curious hummock. After that, mercifully, all is blackness. My aunts discovered me beside a nearby megalith, with my faculties paralyzed, a mark on my forehead bespeaking all too vividly the ravages of some snail-like marsupial. It was months before I regained the ability to talk any language but proto-Algonquian. Now my senses have somewhat cleared, I recommend you break things off with your fiancée as tactfully as possible, not letting her suspect you have noticed any change or blemish. Hers is such an image as — but I cannot go on. I have barricaded myself indoors, and hope never to look at another photograph, or touch any variety of leafy vegetable. Even Dalgaard’s worst prophesies fell short of the unspeakable reality! A rank odor now pervades everything, the hills resonate with sustained prehuman howling, and I keep losing my place in the Unrecommended Codex of Naarg,
Yrs Strkly. Trrfd., – HPL.
How do you like your meat?
Bioengineers in the Netherlands are now growing meat in a laboratory where the future of food is being prepared – in a Petri dish
Am I weird for thinking this is brilliant? Or do I just get stoked about sic-fi becoming real? And if that meat gained sentient thought, trying to take over the world, even better!
via HackerNews
